Here Come The Waterworks

It happened again. Another pre 40 meltdown. The first one happened a few months ago while watching the movie This Is 40. As Paul Rudd's wife in the movie was celebrating her 39th birthday, again, I had a harsh realization that my August 2013 birthday would be my final for my thirty's. The tears came and they came hard. I could not stop the powerful emotions that overtook me. I woke up the kids with my wailing and scared my husband. He normally is a good consoler but the vibe I was getting was "what the Faaaaaa?"

So this second one happened last night. This time we were watching a tv show and a 9 year old boy asked his dad how old he was. The dad muttered 41, and the kid replied, that is old. Much like the first time, the tears just gushed but luckily all kids remained in bed. The main thing different about this time, is that Rex Goliath was in the house and so was my monthly visitor, whom we  affectionately call Hilda. Both may have helped to create a perfect storm of irrational emotionalty.

My husband was even less consoling last night and I think he is over it. The whole me wanting to have a huge 40th birthday party is not what bothers him its the me trying to plan, organize and direct the event. I think he really wants to do something nice but I am not letting him for fear of being disappointed. I know in my heart I cannot be disappointed on this birthday especially in my aging state of mind.

Men just don't get it. I told my husband that part of the problem is that his sexiest years are still ahead of him...salt and pepper hair, furrowed brow, hearing loss. My sexiest days are past. Of course that is probably not a result of my age but because of the three children I carried. Holy stretch marks Batman! I had my first ever facial last weekend, which was awesome but I ended up buying a $60 travel size kit of products because I was told my face is showing signs of aging. When I told my husband about the organic Hungarian face crème I bought, his response was take it back. He then brought up my 92 year old grandmother who had great skin for nine decades and all she used was Noxzema and nicotine.

So in closing I have learned a few things, I need to stop watching movies and tv for awhile and start smoking.