Great Expectations

 

We don't know how good we had it.

I say that to my husband whenever we see a baby.

Those little ones are so unaware of all of the love and effort that are going into taking care of them. They sit in their stroller/car seat without a care in the world and won't remember much of the best time of their lives.

I say the best time because there are no worries. No awareness of the pain and suffering that is going on around them. Babies M.O. is basically sleep, eat, poop. That's it. There is no - pay bills, go to work, clean the house. Sleep, eat, poop. All the good stuff.

Don't get me wrong. There are good parts of other stages of life. But babies, they have it pretty darn good.

Since we don't remember when we were babies, we definitely don't remember the time before we were born - when our arrival was anxiously awaited.

I was the first grandchild on my father's side. I was the first of what would end up being seven grandchildren. But the first, well, we're kind of special. I always knew this because I had a nickname. My grandmother called me Sweetie. She never called me Kristen. Her daughter, my Aunt Sandy, never calls me Kristen. Always Sweetie.

Another thing...my second sibling. Well, he got a nickname too only because of his relationship to me. My grandma called him Brother. He was in fact my brother but grandma was the only one who called him that.

My specialness was never lost on me but was recently reaffirmed.  My mom has been going through boxes/drawers of things at her house. Over the past year, I have been given letters I wrote while I was in college, awards I received in high school and even my kindergarten class photo. These things are all nice to add to my personal collection but only finalize the fact that my parents will not be erecting a Kristen Keleschenyi Museum any time soon.

Recently, I was given something I am amazed still exists. It was a card sent to my mother, from her mother-in-law, congratulating her on her pregnancy. My mom and dad were practically newlyweds, married in March of 1973 and expecting their first child by August of 1974. They were living in an apartment, had just started out on their new life as husband and wife, not even a year into it, and were now preparing to start a family.

I personally would have been very nervous about becoming a mom so soon after starting a new marriage but it appears everybody was excited about this little baby that was about to enter the scene.

"We certainly will be proud of our grandchild," my grandmother wrote 49 years ago. Heck, I hadn't even done anything yet and they knew they were going to be proud.

It was pretty amazing to read the cover "To A Lovely Mother To Be". I wondered what it must have been like for my parents finding out they were expecting and not knowing what the future would hold. I guess it was similar to what my husband and I experienced when we were expecting the first time around. We were so happy and anxious to meet our little one. We couldn't wait to be parents. It was a role both my husband and I knew we were destined for. I know it is a role my parents treasure and their grandchildren have been their greatest joy in their retirement years.

I was 12 when my Grandpap Bishop passed away and I was 22 when my Grandma Bishop passed away. I had not a doubt they were proud of me and their other grandchildren. (My grandmother had the newspaper clippings to prove it!) I wish she could have met my husband and her great-grandchildren, especially my daughter who was born eight years to the day my grandmother passed away.

When you are almost 50 and thinking about what you have left to accomplish, it is humbling to think of a time when you hadn't accomplished anything and were already loved no matter what. It is nice to think of the nurturing environment I was born into and I am truly grateful to know my parents are still providing that environment years later, and not just for me, but for my kids and my sister's kids.

 

The next time I see a baby, I'm not going to look at him or her through my eyes. I am going to look at that little one from the perspective of those who awaited that little one's arrival with hope and anticipation and remember my grandparents who couldn't wait to meet me. I hope all of these years later, I am continuing to make them proud and maybe even allowing them, in a special way, to catch a glimpse of themselves and the legacy they left behind. 

*My blog is featured each week in the On My Mind column in The Valley Mirror Newspaper. The paper covers the Steel Valley and Woodland Hills communities.*