So what do you do when your kid is afraid? Legitimately afraid and refuses to participate in the team sport he signed up for?
A few weeks ago my youngest, who plays kid-pitch baseball, got hit in the head while he was up to bat. Luckily, I wasn't there for that event and even my husband, who was there, looked away at that particular second and when he looked back at the batter's box he saw our son lying on the ground.
The little guy had a helmet on and that cushioned the blow. So I think him laying on the ground may have been the result of a little overdramatization on his part. Of course everyone rushed to his aid, and of course there was crying involved but once it was determined he was ok, off to first base he went.
The rest of the game went fine and when he returned home he had quite the story to tell - as he finished his Dairy Queen Blizzard. It was funny to hear him recount the event like a soldier who had returned home from battle. "It was a bad scene...."
This season of fall ball has been a transition for us. Prior to now, it was the coaches who were on the mound throwing to the kids. My son is one of the youngest on his team and some of the kids have been pitching for a couple years now.
Despite their youth, some of these kids get some speed on their throws. The first kid pitch game I attended I felt like I was at PNC Park. I was aghast. I exclaimed to my husband, "Just how old are these kids? These pitches are like 70 miles an hour!"
As a mother, I have been reluctant to send my kiddo into these circumstances. It has been a long time since I've been part of this level of baseball.
Our oldest retired after his first season of T-Ball and pretty much for the same reason. He often played catcher and he didn't like speeding objects coming at his head. So prior to now, my most recent experience with kid pitch goes back to when my brother was little and since I really didn't care about baseball I didn't really pay attention. I know he probably got hit with a ball quite a few times in his career, and I am sure he had to get back in there or deal with a major pep talk from our dad.
Fast forward a week or two from the head hitting incident, my son got rammed in the foot with a hard hit ground ball to second. This one I was there for and I not only saw it - I heard it. I was convinced his foot was broken and as he lay on the ground, for a second time, I watched from the bleachers until I could not wait any longer and ran over to the field.
We inspected his foot back in the dugout and amazingly it looked fine and within a few minutes he was walking on it. He put some ice on the little bump and just relaxed. His coach asked if we were going to Children's Hospital but, with a $300 co-pay just to walk in the door, we told him we would see how it goes. By the end of the game, my son was back in the outfield.
So now he has been hit twice, he cries before each game and his batting record is down the tubes. (He has struck out pretty much every time he has been up to bat since the head hit.) He has been talking about retirement - at the age of 8.
I have tried being stern. "Your team needs you. You can't quit now there are only a few games left."
I have tried being sympathetic. "You have been through a trauma. I get it. You are scared but you have to get back in there and work through this."
My most recent attempt - probably not the best- "Just swing at every pitch and get it over with."
As you can see I've been worn down but nothing prepared my husband and I for the cry fest on Monday and complete refusal to participate in the game. He sat with me in the bleachers. He sat with my husband in the dugout. Coaches tried to coerce him to get in the game. Our son was not having it.
I felt like I brought this on myself because of another stellar pep talk we had in the car when the tantrum started after we got to the game. My son said he was embarrassed he cried both times when he got hit. He said you never see professional players cry and they are always cool. I said, "You are a kid. They are grown men. I love that you are not afraid to show your emotions. That's cool too." I would have tweaked my talk a little had I known he was going to show his emotions for two and a half hours.
So here we are with one game left. I don't know what is going to happen but I don't want him to end the season on a bad note. I would like the storybook ending where he makes a great catch in right field for the out and gets a grand slam while up to bat to help boost his confidence because the kid does have talent and loves sports. He just needs to get out of his head but I am not sure how to accomplish this. And maybe time is all he needs.
I set up a practice session with his uncle, who has been coaching for decades and can really break down the nuts and bolts of the game. When my little guy came home afterwards he said, "I feel a little more confident now." Let's hope that confidence spills over into Saturday. Having the World Series to watch right now is also a good motivator.
This type of stuff I have never been quite prepared for as a parent but, somehow, I hope we make it to the other side. If down the road he makes his major league debut, I will say it was all worth it. But for now...this Pinterest quote from Jaja Q pretty much sums it up: "Life is like a baseball game. When you think a fastball is coming you gotta be ready to hit the curve." With kids - the curves are pretty much a given.
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